Squiddus Alma Mater Frigidus

Greetings, humans. I feel no need to excuse myself for not writing during the past few weeks--my human went home on break and took our laptop with her. A most discourteous action, I know, but an understandable one. Suffice it to say that I spent the time hibernating and sipping on cafe au lait du chocolatl, and I was none too pleased to see the humans returning over the past few days.

The focus of today's discourse shall be the cancellation of classes and/or school in general due to inclement weather conditions. The human has now experienced four different types of such cancellations, and I find it quite fascinating to observe how pansy-like humans in general are--particularly those who are in charge of decision-making.

Cancellation type #1: A storm day. Several years ago, the second or third day of school was cancelled due to stormy weather conditions. Thunderstorms are a frequently-occurring natural phenomenon that have been bothering humans since the beginning of time. You would think that they would know how to deal with it by now, but clearly having small humans in school all day during a severe thunderstorm might have been detrimental to their health. Apparently one of the generators blew out at a nearby school, which might occasionally be cause for mild concern, but surely it did not necessitate the entire district cowering under their couch cushions and fearing for their lives. Squids, of course, are not bothered by thunderstorms. It's like being in a loud and foamy hot tub, minus the heat.

Cancellation type #2: A snow day. Surely the most common and most eagerly-desired type of school cancellation for children young and old, the snow day is a wondrous concept. Small humans tend to skip homework the night before a big snowstorm and eagerly awaken to the sound of that blissful, beautiful phone call from the district. Sometimes snow days are convenient and wonderful, such as last year when my human's winter break started two days early due to a happy combination of vouchers and snow. Other times, they are horrid and inconvenient, such as the two days last semester that caused the human to miss out on valuable shop time for 3D. Still, the snow day seems to be a very satisfying display of human pansiness in general, and I quite approve of the concept.

Cancellation type #3: A cold day. Clearly, not all humans are created Eskimo. And clearly, a windchill of negative 50 degrees might be rather uncomfortable to those waiting for a bus. And sometimes water pipes freeze and the toilets are nearly always negatively affected by that sort of development. Cold days, therefore, are an example of supreme pansiness that is nevertheless very helpful to chilly bus-riding humans.

Cancellation type #4: An ice day. The human is currently moping around the room for the second day in a row thanks to one of these. She informed me that she also nearly died several times on the way to and from FAC due to the numerous frozen streams that previously held the title of "cement walkways." I was amused. It is no longer raining and cars seem to be doing just fine out there, but there was obviously a pansy human somewhere who felt that walking around on ice was a bad idea. This will therefore be a two-day school week for the human, and I will have to put up with her for that much longer because of it.
Such is the life of a Squid.

Cheers,
Squidmore